Love Letters from the North

The Christmas season is officially upon us, and as I wander around this lovely city, I am filled with profound feelings of thanks, of brotherly (or sisterly) love, feelings which I can no longer hold inside of me.  In order to release the karmic goodness I am feeling inside, I have composed several small love notes, in the hopes that the addressees may feel some small part of my love for them as it is released into the universe. 

Dear #46 Bus Driver:

Thank you ever so much for always being late.  The schedule says you come at 4:13; you almost never come before 4:20.  This discrepancy in time always makes for a pleasant experience, because then I get to stand at the bus stop, reading my book, while the wind wends its whistling way through my jacket and scarf, until you show up.  The one time I tried to wait a little longer before going out to wait, you came right on time!  You sure got me then, you sneaky little devil!  I had to sprint across the street in boots, but that was okay, because I could call it exercise.  So thank you, #46 Bus Driver, for giving me the chance to shiver or sprint off those few extra calories every Tuesday and Wednesday.  What would I do without you?

Lately Yours,
Claire
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Dear University Station LRT Boarders,

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for giving me a true "public transit" experience every time I ride up to campus.  It makes me feel so loved and accepted, the way you all try to board the LRT before I step off - I feel like a real city girl now!  I had always wondered what it would be like to be trampled by a herd of stampeding bovines - I now feel as though I have a pretty good grasp on how it feels, so thank you for giving me that life experience.

Yours from the Floor,
MatWoman (a.k.a. Claire)

P.S. - And I'm sorry about all the times I used my elbows as weapons to clear a path off the train - it was an involuntary reflex of my sudden-onset claustrophobia.
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Dear Weather,

I will never forget the kindness you have shown me this past week.  I thought, after the -35 night we had, that you hated me.  I know I didn't feel kindly toward you at all.  The snow, the wind, the cold...it was just too much.  I know you wanted to give me a true Canadian winter experience, but it was a bit harsh for a poor little Cali girl like me.  Thank you for realizing that it was too much, too soon, and bringing the temperature back up to hover between 4 and -4.  I promise, now that I know what true cold feels like, I won't complain (much) about the lovely days you keep giving me.  Hugs and kisses if you can make it last until I go home!

Warmly Yours
Claire
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Dear Cats,

You guys are the best pets ever!  How did you know I wanted those earrings gone?  I was thinking, "Gosh, I sure do hate these little cz studs that I wear all the time.  If only they disappeared, I wouldn't feel like I had to wear them every other day," and you read my mind!  Thank you for stealing them off my bedside table and using them as a play toy while I was downstairs - if I'd seen you take them, I might have felt obligated to stop you.  I would only caution you - next time you steal my jewelry, make sure you dispose of it thoroughly - I found one earring and back at the foot of my bed.  If I hadn't, I might never have known what happened to them!

Yours in Affection,
Claire

P.S. - Good job on hiding the other one, though - I have no idea where it went, and I've looked all over!  You guys are good!
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Dear Honky-Tonk Ba-donk-a-donk,

Thank you for making pants shopping such a pain it the a- >a-hem<, bum.   I love the way you make it so, if pants fit me around the waist, they're too tight in the front because you pull them back so far, and when I go up a size to accommodate you, they fall off the minute I sit down.  It's been super fun trying to find pants that fit me properly and don't cost a boatload - impossible, actually!  But I do love a challenge!  So thanks for that!

Fittingly (or not) Yours,
Claire

P.S. - Sorry I keep trying to get rid of you.  But good job hanging on, despite my twelve pounds of lost weight!
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Dear Wells Fargo Dimwit Banker Lady,

Thank you for cancelling my debit card when I called to tell you to take the purchase shield charges off my account.  And thank you for lying to me and telling me it wouldn't take effect until I gave the submission go-ahead.  The fact that you don't know your own company's policies regarding cancelling a service makes me feel all warm and snuggly inside, secure in the knowledge that you are part of the company that manages my money.  Thank you for making it impossible for me to access the funds that my dad loaned me to see me through until I go home.  It's nice to have money in the bank, with absolutely no way to get it!  And tell your company thanks from me for taking their sweet time getting me a replacement card - it's made this past week really exciting!

Yours in Irritation,
Claire
P.S. - We'll talk more about those service charges later...